Hunting for Creatures in the Forest

"Bab's the Tracker"

This is the River Tromie, it is a short walk through the woods from Porch home. It's a really cool river.
Phil said it might have Salmonds in it. Babs would love to see a Salmond, especially one thats not in a tin of Mart and Stumpys food.
Marge was worried that there might be Big Brown Bears around, so we had to get off quickly.

Bab's found this footingprint, Phil reckons its an Elephant, Marge told him not to be silly Elephants don't live near "King Gussie".
Phil swore he had seen one this very morning, Marge told him not to swear and said he had probably had too many Bellhavens last night.
Poor Phil, probably only saw a Squizzle he, he.

Phil said over the river was the Place where they make a Scotrish drink called "Wiskey", Phil says he likes a "Wee Dram" or two.
Marge said she likes "Big Drams", Babs has no idea what a Dram is, but if they both like it Babs would like to try one!

Phew, down the track a bit Marge found this, she said it looked like Phil's!
Phil said "Shut up, it was probably an Elephants Dropping".
Marge dared me to have a Sniff!

Struth, that brought tears to my eyes!
Actually Bab's thinks this is a "Cow tom", Phil said "Pat".
There was no way Babs was going to "Pat That".

Wow, this walk is full of interesting stuff. This was a round yellow ball thing.
Marge said "perhaps it fell off a Golf Ball Tree".
She does talk rubbish some times, Everybody knows Golf balls are made by "Robert's in Factories"!

Blinking heck, Babs thinks Marge has brought me on a "Poo walk", Babs got worried when we found this rather large Jobby.
Phil recons it might be a Rhonosarus, and said we should make tracks.
Babs said she did not need to "Make Tracks" and anyway she could never make a track this big no matter how much she ate!
Marge said Phil could ! Poor Phil!

Phil did not want to hang around and hurried off ahead.
We followed on and it Looks like Marge was right, He, he!

"Come on Marge".
Babs finks she is overloaded wiff Suvineers!
Poor Phil he will struggle to fit it all in the Peegoat tomorrow!

Later on while Phil was packing Marges stuff, Mr Squizzle popped round for a Nut and a chat.
He said he was sorry to see us leave, he said our nuts were top class and he liked the fact that Babs spent the time to talk with him.
I told him we would be back in six mumfs, he was pleased about that.

Before Phil packed Babs stuff, I was allowed to try on my new "Coat of Many Culours" that Marge got me from "King Gussie".
Don't I look the biziness?

Phil took my coat I asked him if I could help Marge Dig up some plants to take home.
Phil just started to cry!
What did I say?

Phil did not need to worry we only collected 2 plants so we will easily fit them in!

Aww, that pleased Phil. He got all teary eyed and said we should have a family phornograph
Phil set up his Tripad and put the cambra on shelf timer.
Babs does luv her humands!

The "Last Supper" in our Porch Home was Vagitarian Pork chops from Aviemore.
Marge cooked them in a Hunny and Onion glaze and boy they were Luvley!
Marge struggled to eat her half, Babs managed a quarter.
Phil said "Was there any more?" Poor Phil!

Marge made a sign in the glass, Phil was really pleased and thanked Marge!
Marge said she meant she luvs porch house.
Poor Phil!

This was the worst journey in Bab's life. Back to the "Real world".
Marge cried all the way home, Phil couldn't because he had to drive.
Roll on next "Porch Home".